Please Drink Responsibly
You don't wanna fuckin' think
Just wanna fuckin drink
To use your brain is just too damn stressful for you.
You're only seventeen,
Your liver and your spleen
Are getting tainted just to slam chestfuls of brew
And chase with mountain dew.
Permission isn't granted unless I can party too.
You heard me right,
No, I ain't gon' let you go,
Unless I can get hammered
I was pregnant, I know what's it's like to puke every morning.

I'll be responsible,
I'll put the super in parental supervision.
Let's drink until even the fat kid noone wants is full.
My Mini Cooper is a rental, oh forget it let's drive.

You don't wanna fuckin' talk
You're such a fuckin' jock
You swear to me that you are 18 ok good.
I wouldn't but I could.
I couldn't but I should.
Comparably well you are a dream, oh my God.
That quarterbackin' bod,
I think I'm gonna have to make a motion for his rod.
You heard me right,
Oh, all right ok let's go,
I gotta fuckin' have ya
I had children, I know what it's like to be kept up all night.

I'll be responsible.
I'll put the pro in the always use protection.
Let's fuck until the safety net that noone wants is full.
I'm not a ho, well not always, look just give it to me good.

Nothin' I say is genuine.
Nothin' I say means anything at all.

I'll put the pro in providing alcohol to minors.
Hey who fuckin' called the cops?